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Santorum Defeats Santorum

Greetings Guernica readers. I’d like to thank my new corporate overlords Michael and Joel for allowing me entry to this hallowed blogging ground. I’ve been asked to say a few words about the elections, which is either a recognition of a foreigner’s capacity for greater perspective or a sadistic move on the part of the aforementioned overlords to make someone who can’t vote recount the blessings of the mandate from beyond the red line of citizenship, like Moses at the brink of the promised land.

But enough bible-bashing. Indeed, the possible end of a scarily bible-thumping-intensive period in this nation’s politics is exactly what I logged in to comment on. It’s far too early to make sweeping predictions and pontifications about the vote’s outcome, let alone its impact (not that this has stopped me before) but I wanted to at least make gloating mention of the defeat of vile Torquemada-in-training Rick Santorum, until very recently the junior United States Senator from the great Commonwealth of Pennsylvania. Yes, the man who compared homosexual intercourse to sex between a man and a dog has been handily defeated by Democrat Bob Casey Jr. Credit is due to Dan Savage of Savage Love for his campaign to make his new reader-selected definition of “Santorum” – “The frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex” – the number one result for “Santorum” on a Google search. This correspondent cautions the former Senator to be careful not to slip on any on his way out of the door.

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